Moments of panic

As I told the boy earlier, my lunch today consisted of grilled cheese and tomato soup with a side of panic. Panic is a dish best not served at all, but as I was being a good little student and ordering the remainder of my books for the semester I got an email from the application system of the school I will most likely be attending in the fall. Said email informed me that my application had been “undelivered” because a transcript from a school I attended in 2005 (!) had not been received.

And panic is what I did. I dropped everything I was doing, snapped at a friend I was conversing with, and had flashes of a homeless me holding a sign saying, “I was supposed to be in grad school but I screwed up my application…will dance for cupcakes”. As I logged into the application system, strings of expletives flew out of my mouth and I was fighting the massive urge to a) cry, b) throw up, c) drop out of school, or d) all of the above.

Thankfully, I did none of those things. In fact, I’m pretty proud of the fact that I, instead of curling up on the couch and crying and eating chocolate covered raisins (which are AMAZING by the way), got dressed and marched myself over to the library to print the forms I needed and send faxes. Basically, I was determined to take care of business. And I did take care of business: my application is again “delivered” and that pesky transcript should be sent out at the beginning of next week. Hallelujah.

I’m now trying to erase that “taking care of business” song out of my head but I’m pretty pleased about my semi-adult way of handling the situation. Instead of running away from it, I took it on head first…despite the fact that I really just wanted to move into a cave and never come out.

My realization for the day: it’s not the bad moments of life that define you, it’s how you handle them.

{On the running front…because I realize that my so-called “running blog” has been rather light on running material as of late…I did a 4.5 mile sorta tempo run on the treadmill today. I say sorta tempo because it was not as fast as I like my tempo runs to be (8:30 pace or lower) but it was not what I would considering an easy run either (9:00 pace and steady); I suppose it was a hybrid tempo because I was constantly going from a 9:00 pace to an 8:00 pace and all of the other paces in between. I would do 0.3 miles at an 8:57 pace and up that ever .01 miles, usually capping at 7.2 mph (except for the last mile, which I did at an 8:00-8:30 pace). All in all, it was a good run and the changes in pace distracted me enough that time flew by. But I can definitely say that my poor legs are so incredibly ready for a rest day tomorrow}


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